“The only way to truly know an honest person is when the opportunity or reward for lying is great, yet they still choose the honest path”
In a few short weeks, a lot has shifted for me. As the new moon eclipse and Saturn hit my first house, I knew my work would change, I just wasn’t sure how.
For 30 years I have been teaching Yoga and practicing even longer (yes, i started young)…. and I have to say it has been quite a ride. It has brought blessings beyond belief and it has also allowed me to face and recognize some of the darkest shadows.
I have learned that the true mystery and science of Yoga and Ayurveda is flawless. I have also learned that people teaching, practicing and interpreting it, are not.
In my early life, I was devastated by this awareness. Shocked and horrified by the bad behavior of Yogis and that the business of Yoga could, as my one teacher said, be down right ugly. (And this was 20 some years back, before it even became mainstream.)
I also wholeheartedly agreed with David Swenson recently, when he commented that back in the days when yoga was done only by housewives and hippies, it was much more fun.
We as westerners cannot help ourselves. We are consumers and we consume spirituality the same way we consume food, land and fashion. I am sure, if it were possible, we would create drive thru Yoga classes and a Yoga Costco. But the closest we can get to this, is the fast flow yoga class that jams Piyo, ballet, core training, Jimi Hendrix and weight loss all into our 1 hour lunch break or the week long Wanderlust and Yoga festivals, where we can take crash courses with our favorite yoga rock star.
It can all be quite maddening and often depressing.
My path into yoga has always been deeply personal. And by the will of karma, I have shared it with as much authenticity as I could. I might be messy at times and I know for a yoga teacher I cuss more like a sailor, but if there is one anchor in my life it is, and always has been, integrity and truth.
In other words I will not smile and say ‘Namaste’ when I really want to tell someone to F%$ off.
You will always know where i stand.
And at this present juncture, I have chosen to step out of regular ongoing classes and take a break. I have truly loved all of the students I have gotten to be with, share with and grow with, but it is time for me to go back into the silence of my own heart and reconnect with the simple joy of Yoga….. before all the noise….before the yoga billboards, Madonna and the take over of Lulumon.
I will continue to teach deeper immersions ~ Ayurveda workshops and Yoga Teacher Training for those interested, and of course I am still available for private consultation and work.
But for now I will be rolling out my sticky mat in private, in my old beat up t-shirt and sweatpants (just like that first day I entered the Bikram Studio in Scottsdale, not realizing people actually got dressed up for yoga class)
I hope you find your own stillness in the madness of these times….